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Labels are

by on March 26, 2013

A necessary evil.

(Warning shot over bows…..I’m not very good at being PC)

It’s time to stop seeing “labels” as a negative and see them as a part of the lexicon we use to communicate with each other in the process of slowing down discrimination, bigotry, sexism and hate.

(Reality check…we can’t stop any of it…..we can only identify it…….label it and attempt to contain it, slow it down….. as much as humanly possible)

Stop seeing labels as something that cause segregation and use them to understand how to be tolerant of things that have labels that make us uncomfortable.

(Do I hear them damn villagers? Do I need to climb to higher ground and barricade the doors?)

If you think labels are evil……..go to your kitchen right now and either tear off or cover up the labels on every food item there, including the pet food.

Now shuffle them all up and plan to stick to the idea…whatever gets opened…gets put on a plate for dinner tonight.
Some of the items are in containers that blatantly recognizable…right? Cool that makes things a little easier.
Okay… pick up one that looks like two or three others.

Is it canned tomatoes? Maybe it’s canned peas…or if you have a pet in the house…it might be pet food.


you might be able to “guess what it is” by shaking it or by the weight….

but you won’t be able to identify it until you open it.

It’s a not so creepy version of the Schrödinger’s cat paradox.

Only after you open it can you determine if it is the right thing for you.

Just for the hell of it lets really mix things up:
If you are in school….take all the labels off the class rooms and buildings and rearrange where classes and meetings are held….then sit down in a room and HOPE you are in the right spot at the right time.

Is it just me….or does this seems like a hell of a lot of wasted time and complicated effort in the already ~too much time wasted and overly complicated world~ we live in anyways?

Not knowing the “labels” gets in the way of understanding what’s inside the container…….even human containers and the activities the human containers pursue in their pursuit to happiness (or possible misfortune, depending on the label).
Identifying objects….labeling them……… is part of our survival mechanisms…’s hard wired thanks to a something not so inconsequential we all have in our makeup from birth:
The fight or flight instinct.

We can’t hide the obvious labels….we register as some kind of label to the people we encounter and we can’t “not label” those we encounter.
Me…anyone who looks at me is going to automatically label me “short, older, white woman.”

Look a little closer and have some basic knowledge of cultural  genetics ….you’ll notice I am of Irish decent….and you might even notice I am also of Native American decent. There’s a couple of other nationalities mixed in my makeup…but these two are the most obvious, the ones that get me labeled.

Listen to me speak and you might be able to label my birth region in the U.S. and if you can distinguish the different tenors to accents of the U.S…you might be able to guess the state I was born in…or at least the basic “four state area” that formed the hick’type twang that is in my inflection and really noticeable after a couple of drinks or if I am off the charts pissed.

This “inflection” often gets me labeled redneck and in turn “mechanically—as in a reflex more than a conscious thought”— leads to the assumption I am uneducated and probably a raging homophobic and bigot.

This always irritates me because generally the ones who use that label don’t have the slightest clue of what the origin of that “label” is.

It irritates me but it doesn’t send me into an angry rage because:


The origination of that term had nothing to do with being a bigot or being stupid……it just meant the person called a “red neck” was farm stock……they worked outside in the sun to make a living. At this point in time you could spot the farm folk in a crowd because the back of their neck was sun burned from working out in the fields. I come from a long line of farm folk and I am not ashamed of it.

No doubt at that time some used the words ..and it is TWO WORDS..NOT ONE—as an insult…but hey the gens that are around now days didn’t invent bigotry and narrow mindedness…..and some days I wonder if we have changed much…if all the growing we have done as a populace to try to prevent it…just reshaped the way we do it so it doesn’t seem so obvious…..cuz really…does a leopard change it spots?

We swapped out “touchy feelie—can’t we all just get along” ribbon wearing for common sense examination of labels and the ones claiming the labels….or doing the labeling …….making it harder to distinguish the scary part of who we are when we label others and in the act to avoid being labeled a bigot or accused of being discriminatory we have stuck our heads in the sand or looked the other way when we spot something that truly needs to be labeled and called out for what it is: WRONG.

We have swung the “justice for all” pendulum so far to the other side in trying to be right and fair…some days we aren’t any more rational and even-handed on this up swing then the other upswing was.

In the process of trying to be tolerant and accepting………so many lines have been blurred we are just dazed and confused.

*bug eyes here*

Damn A.D.D.butterflies……sorry ……… getting side tracked here.

Back to:
Not knowing the “labels” gets in the way of understanding what’s inside the container…….

Even human containers and the activities the human containers pursue in their pursuit to happiness (or possible misfortune, depending on the label).

Try this:

Think about labels as identifiers, things we identify with.

Learn to use labels with respect and respect the weight they carry. Own the labels with pride and expect to have to stand your ground as you own them.

MHO…and a hard learned HO…..
In the world of kinkdom………it is impossible to think SSC or RACK…….without labels.
Labels alone can identify boundaries and hard limits…the likes and dislikes of the ones you mingle with.

My labels—what I identify with—- in the kink world are:
The D in a FemDom styled D/s poly relationship.
Since I claim these lables….it is MY JOB to make sure anyone who doesn’t understand what they mean to me…understand………and it is my job to do it in a way that isn’t bellicose and reflect on others who claim these titles in a negative way.
If there’s one in the crowd who insists on being consistently hostile about the topics….me arguing with them is only going to push away the ones who are trying to understand, at some point the argument will lose its entertainment value ( i.e watching a train wreck in slo’mo) and anyone who was there trying to learn and understand is going to move on and the chance to educate is lost.

I am all over the map here and building a wall of words….

So for now label me:
 (to regroup…and reassess the topography of this freakin map…cuz I think I made a zig when I shoulda made a zag.)

From → Amplifications

  1. This made so much sense.


  2. Don’t eat the cat food. Check. 😛

    Well done, Serendipity.


Trackbacks & Pingbacks

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The Suburban Domme

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