Where to start….

A million voices…..only two hands to type with and my typing skill is  “hunt and peck”.

I’ll start here.

My life doesn’t look like what some would consider a “BDSM FemDomme” lifestyle. It doesn’t look anything like the porn, it doesn’t look like the stories……it just looks like…us.

A couple who has weathered some tough times….emotionally, physically and financially…and with his kinks nature…and somehow managed to come thru it all….scarred……..but smarter.

I’m not looking to debate the minute semantics of what is or isn’t “FemDomme-D/s-24-7 etc-etc-etc”…..the words “true or natural” preceding the words Domme/Mistress or submissive don’t mean squat in my world.

I abhor slashy speak and the “this slave will” third person jargon. It has no appeal to me. It doesn’t work with my style as a dominate woman.

The “spare room” looks like a guest room until the “hidden aspects” are pulled out from nooks, crannies and under the bed. It’s armed to the teeth with all kinds of that one would find in a Pro Domme’s dungeon.

No one will ever be in there under the whip, locked in the stock or strung up on the Saint Andrew’s cross…but my husband. I have perfected the art of forced femming, cbt, sph, humiliation, and cucking along with a few other things that go on inside the hallowed walls of a Pro Domme’s lair….. and looking to expand my kink repertoire under the tutelage of some very special women in my life.

They offered me friendship at a time that I felt like my world was coming apart over my husband’s kinks. They helped me understand how to use FemDomme as a tool….to control my husband’s kinky nature so his nature wasn’t controlling us. But even more important, they showed him how to let me be who I am, how to let me develop my own style inside the lifestyle.

This is me…..taking my husband’s many, many fetish urges and making them work in a fashion that doesn’t have him feeling like he needs to hide a part of who he is and keeping those fetish urges from tearing me and our marriage apart.

What works at my house may or may not work for others.

This is just “my style”.

If you follow this and get something out of it…groovy.

If it works in some small way, great.

If it doesn’t…..then keep searching for your own answers.

To address a comment……

“What do I do when I have a hard day and want to just cuddle?”

Fact is…I don’t have many “hard days”.

I have frantic moments (hours) in my days.

I have days that I don’t like people very much……(and on those days…I’m not very likeable) but overall…I have an easy life.

I own a business with my husband….my share of the work is done sitting in my living room. I work at my leisure, on my own time frame. There are days I wish I could get ahold of some moron that screwed up paper work….but in the end…it’s all fixable.

My kids are “grown” and yeah I use that word loosely. *eye rolls/laughing*

I say grown……not grown up…so there are days we have the “kiddo crisis” to deal with, but rarely it is anything that can’t be handled with a few words and some “get your head out of your ass and act like the adult you are” real world rattling.

I’ve raised my kids, have a thriving business and life overall is grand.

I am indulged to the hilt by my husband. I have everything I need and pretty much everything I want.

I’m not a “huggy cuddly” person but I do have the urge once in a while to crawl in his lap and let his big bad Alpha side……hold me and just let me break down.

When I want that….I just crawl in his lap….we’ve been married for over 30 years….he knows what me crawling in his lap means.

I don’t do the lap thing very often. He knows when I do crawl in his lap, I don’t want to have to deal with the kinks, and I need to connect with him as my life partner, my equal…… my best friend. When I am that down, I need him on my level and the “D/s” goes dormant until I back to my full abilities and ready to take back the role as his Domme.