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Selfish FemDom Snob

by on March 5, 2013

Making my email address so easily accessible…didn’t come easy.

In the past I have received some emails that have been everything from ones that are so badly written they are comical to others that are so creepy it reminds one of how dangerous the world is to ones that just make a person want to cry.

I have been asked why I am so reluctant to share the glorious blow by blow details of my FemDom life.

Here’s why:

I’m not very good at writing erotic or chic lit. I don’t watch chic flix; I don’t read bodice rippers or romance novels. I don’t read erotica.

I am a fan of Kuntz, Clancy, King, Patterson, and books that are either educational or biographical; my brain is not hard wired to think “romantic and spicy”.  And anyone who has spent some time reading this blog knows it for sure as hell ain’t hard wired to “just roll with it and think” kinky.

Believe me, all three of my guys bitch about this often….they would love it if I could sit down and write for them and on occasion I do….but is a LOT of work for me because I have to spend so much time rewriting whatever I write to get it hot and juicy, instead of just long in words and short on spice.

And also……the “FemDom D/s” around out place ain’t all that “glorious”.

I don’t have him shackled to anything, he isn’t running around the house in nothing but a “gates of hell” and high heels and a butt plug parked firmly in his bum hole, doing chores saying “Yes Mistress” or standing in a silent pose waiting for orders. I’m not sitting on the sofa, sipping wine, eating bon-bons,  dressed like Elvira the Evil in black leather head to toe, waving a whip around screeching and sneering.

Do those things happen? Yes, in planned scenes, along with all kinds of kinky crazy mild to wild——looks like it came right of a BDSM porn movie—– in a limited time frame and because I am so lousy at writing erotica, the planned scenes are based on HIS fantasies that have been adjusted and adapted to fit my flair and tastes as his Domme.

Kink is woven into the tapestry of who we are as a couple, it is not a rug we wrap ourselves in.

It’s a lot of little things that lead into a planned scene.

I use so many small thing–odd bits– it would be impossible to list them without writing a posting that would rival War and Peace. Everything I use is meant to stoke and stroke his fetish urges to help him get and keep the “endorphin high” he craves from my actions as his Domme.

It is  his reward for staying in line and being what I want in a submissive. I don’t punish to train. I reward good behavior.

The title of this post comes from a comment made to me one time. I was told that I am a selfish FemDom snob because I didn’t want to be kind and share the wealth by giving the blow by blow details of how I train, abuse and torture my men.

It’s not for lack of trying…it’s just too damned trying to try to do it….so I’ll wear the title of selfish FemDom snob, with pride…

Because I firdamnshore EARNED IT!

3 Comments
  1. writingthebody permalink

    I think you are right to be cautious. YOur private life is not some place where anyone can traipse through with you unprotected. Even ideas and things said can hurt you. You have every right to set your limits here, and also in terms of email etc. I have not had much email contact with people here, not because I do not like them or what they say – I do like some of them very much. You are not selfish – you have a relationship and it is working….don’t let too many people into the kitchen. And only share what it is ok for both of you to share, if that makes sense. I admire what you two have made – his role is also important (I speak as a masochist myself) – but he is lucky indeed to have you as well! Good luck to both of you, and make sure you two do exactly as you please….

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  2. I love reading everything you write. If you were to write a play by play there is a good chance I would not read it all. The honesty and the struggles is what I like. I like the idea that no matter the life style there is always more room for growth and learning. Being real and true to yourself and yours it what makes me keep coming back.

    Like

  3. “I’m not sitting on the sofa, sipping wine, eating bon-bons, dressed like Elvira the Evil in black leather head to toe, waving a whip around screeching and sneering.”

    It’s never occurred to me to sit on the couch eating bon-bons… That might be fun! Thanks for the suggestion. 😀

    Like

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