Learning the art of FemDom
Each Domme is an artist in her own very distinctive way.
We each have our own artistic penchant, our own self centric flair.
Like a snow flake, we may look similar, but we each have our own unique and unusual ways that are ours and ours alone.
We are who we are in our “Dommess” is who we are……. at our core……as a woman.
You can change our hair color, you can change our clothes but under that…we are still who we were before the cosmetic changes were made.
Each Domme has her own style and medium she likes to work with…from the partners she chooses, to how she chooses to implement the equipment….to the way she fashions her art.
These choices are as personal to the Domme artist as they are to a painter when she chooses the color of paint or a brush, a sculptress when she handles clay………. any artist who choose whatever they choose, they choose it because it what they need to do their very best art work. They know what they need by instinct.
Some learn early they have this artistic talent and set about life knowing they can create fabulous pieces of art with the talent for themselves and the ones they ask to be their “medium”.
Others discover the FemDom artist in their soul when a partner asked them becomes the artist to craft the master piece that becomes their “FemDom” art work.
My style, artistic flair… by the seat of my pants……if I were to choose an artist that uses the same style I use…….it would be a cross of Andy Warhol and Jackson Pollock.
My medium, S.A.M—- Smart Assed Masochist with a strong Alpha side.
My equipment, whatever I have handy when the mood to create “A work of Domme art” strikes me.
I don’t live to Domme, I Domme to live…..my life on the edge with the SAM who keeps me looking for more ways to create more exciting works of “Domme art”.
Before I could be a Domme artists that creates art works I enjoy, I had to teach my husband enjoy me for the artist I am, for the art work I could create with my own unique “Domme” abilities. Not reproduce the art work of other Dommes.
My husband wanted a Domme artist who had a flair for evil sneers and mean punishment.
A Domme, walking around in steel heeled/toed stilettoes ready to crush his penis under my heel, or kick him in the scrotum with the toe, barking orders with crop in hand every minute ready to smite him for being a bad slave.
Here’s the problem with that…….
I am a klutz and I giggle when I get stressed/uncomfortable or something doesn’t feel natural.
My “Domme spun art” …..no matter how hard I try…always looks like a cartoon out of control.
An evil sneer ends up looking like I am trying to do a bad impression of the legendary “Elvis lip curl”.
I’m not very convincing at mean. At just a little over 5ft 2in even in heels I’m not very threatening and being mean to someone I care about….makes me uncomfortable and I giggle.
Vengeful…nope……can’t. I don’t do vengeful. I don’t get mad, I don’t get even, I get ahead.
My bark sounds more like squeal.
Even trying to “do it his way” my Domme art work…looked like a cartoon out of control.
He finally clued into the fact the cartoon was much more vivid, enchanting and enjoyable when he let me be the artistic producer for the cartoon…..instead of expecting me to be the artistic reproducer of others Domme art work.
No matter how I do it or whose art work he asked me to reproduce, I am a Domme artist whoes true talent lays in the ability to turn everything into a cartoon.
Good thing neither one of us outgrew our love for cartoons.
The Suburban Domme 
Wow, I have learned so much in such a short time reading your comments. I’m male, “submissive” I thought, but I fit into the category similar to your partner where I have urges every so often that make me want to be a slave. I love my wife and don’t desire anybody but her, but I want the heels and the whip and I want to be denied so that I can stay horny just to please her. She won’t do it – saying she wants me to want her just as she is – I can understand her, but I still get the submissive feelings. Any ideas for me?
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While I was reading this piece, I realized that you pretty much described me and my dilemma perfectly. I’m also a klutz and a goofball and I tend to be a giggly, sweet, sensual woman who will do anything he wants. Here’s the problem: he wants me to tie him down, give him a good flogging, tell him what to do and then make him beg to be allowed to do it. My klutzy sweet side has problems with that. I enjoy my Dom side, but I’m just so timid and shy that I don’t let her out enough (unless there’s alcohol involved…) Any advice on how to be a little less timid?
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